Category Archives: Technology

Top 5 reasons to stop typing in “Textlish”

Darth Grammar finds your lack of punctuation disturbing.

Reason #5

The perception of you by others may not be what you think. This isn’t about occasional mistakes; we all make typographical errors on occasion. Typing in Textlish is an ongoing practice—a lifestyle, if you will. Seemingly there is no shame, acknowledgement, or awareness in the perpetrators. You may feel you’re always in too much of a hurry to take the extra 0.3 seconds to type “your” instead “ur.” However, the recipient of your Textlish may think you’re ignorant (as in uneducated). Note the fuzzy logic here: “It’s not that I don’t know better, I’m just always short on time.” Well, whenever the Textlish is not just “shortcuts” but also regularly full of blatant errors, such as “there” instead of “they’re” (or “their,” depending), then you leave readers with limited options about what to think. They might give you the benefit of the doubt, but several gaffes in a single post or message, or ongoing habits in every message, will likely push them toward seeing you as unlearned.

Reason #4

Lowering your own standards to type in Textlish is habit forming. Ever hear of “muscle memory”? Whenever you eventually need to switch on your “real English” for communications related to, say, a job interview, you might let something slip that could be detrimental to your reputation or simply less than putting your best foot forward. The habit of typing in Textlish gets entrenched like nicotine addiction, and slips are as noticeable as—well, let’s just say they are very noticeable.

Reason #3

The future deserves better. Textlish is becoming the de facto language of our tech-oriented culture. We’re all connected. “No man is an island.” Type well, and we all are elevated. Type poorly, and we all are brought lower. Your presentation of yourself in text, tweet, post, etc, has an impact on all who read it. Sadly, some “educators” (including, apparently, the authors of Common Core, a plan for nationwide educational standards being implemented in government schools) have reckoned cursive handwriting to be an outdated relic of the past, with plans to stop teaching it in public schools. If we don’t stand up for proper English in all our typed content, we’re allowing, even opting for, a lazy mishmash of confusing fragments as replacement for our established language’s words. Dictionaries give etymologies, which are the origins and histories behind our words. Imagine when, eventually, noble origins such as Greek, Latin, and Old English must be joined by “Textlish” (or some such description) as the explanation for a single letter being forced to stand in for three or four former words. Our children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren deserve better.

Reason #2

It’s just not that hard to type it right to begin with. Sometimes the alleged “time savings” don’t make sense, because, after all, how much longer would it have taken to type out a real word? How much time does one “save” by typing one or two fewer characters of what should have been only a three- or four-letter word? And if we’re abbreviating, contracting, or leaving off letters for effect, how hard would it be to use the requisite periods and apostrophes? Don’t even get us started on the lack of commas and periods to denote where phrases and sentences are supposed to start and stop. The “Princess Leia” of this war between light and darkness is a preprogrammed digital assistant inside our phones. Thankfully, she types with proper grammar and spelling while taking dictation. Or, at least, she tries.

Reason #1

Darth Grammar. You really want to avoid death by strangulation. Some people are just that annoyed by it. (Just kidding.) We’ve given the darkness a name. Textlish. Won’t you join our quest to vanquish an enemy of all that is decent with regard to modern communication?


Thoughts to ponder about Textlish:

While this method of typing in a hyper-abbreviated “digital shorthand” seems to have resulted originally from limits imposed on the number of characters permitted in SMS text messages and tweets on Twitter.com, use of it has spread beyond SMS texting and tweeting, even into areas where there are no limits on the number of characters. Examples abound in nearly all typed content, including emails, Facebook posts, and blog articles, etc.

Its use in digital domains that do not limit users on the number of characters supports the observation that the practice is often based on factors other than the original (and potentially obsolete) need to stay under a character limit. These factors may include:

  • Once a habit has formed, the behavior happens even when and where it is not needed.
  • People who were never subject to character limits learn the behavior from others, and emulate it to “fit in.”
  • People who were never subject to character limits may be undereducated and may learn the behavior as a common practice, possibly being unaware that it is not proper English.
  • People may take up or maintain the habit simply out of either laziness, desire to conform to trends, or desire to rebel against “the establishment.”

These potential factors support the concern that the practice could become ubiquitous, displacing proper grammar and spelling with ill-advised, confusing fragments that are a poor substitute for the language structure slowly being replaced.

PhpFox: The Awesomest Social Networking Platform Out There

phpFox-webpagethumbnail-1You name it, you’ve used it. You’ve tried Ning (terrible), BuddyPress (terrible), and Joomla’s JomSocial (terrible). You still have a great idea for a social site that can really meet the needs of the niche group you’re involved with. You’re not looking to get rich, but you wouldn’t mind if there was some great monetization involved. You mainly just want to make sure the community you’re a part of is taken care of. After a long search for social networking that actually works, you’ve all but given up.

I have good news: phpFox is what you’re looking for. Trust me. Your search is over. Instead of prospective members leaving in droves while complaining about how hard the site was to navigate, they will be sending you private messages and posting compliments saying, “So cool! How did you do this!? You’re a genius!” I’m not joking.

Yes, I know; you were hoping for something free. But don’t you see that all the free stuff you’ve tried was why you could not get the thing off the ground? You’ve got to bite the bullet. Pay a one-time fee of $300, and enjoy pure awesomeness. Perhaps you can have the niche group you’re serving pay the $300. If you want to monetize your site and you don’t want your members to know what software you’re using, then pay a one-time brand-removal fee of $49 to have all shred of the software maker’s company name removed from the site and all its code. For real.

At the risk of sounding overly cliché, “if you build it, they will come.”

iPhone 4s is very cool, but…

My rant earlier today about the so-called reputable sources being not so reputable, is now vindicated. Apple finally announced, not the iPhone 5, but just the iPhone 4s. Speaking of which, the iPhone 4s is very cool, but it’s not what the iPhone 5 has been touted to become. We still need a changeable battery and the freedom to insert our own (affordable) storage medium, like a micro SD, for example. Can you say, “Milk it for all it’s worth?” Oh well. It is what it is. Now off the store to go buy one. 🙂

iPhone 5 Release!

We have it from reputable sources that…

All the other reputable sources are disreputable. The “company” (aka Apple, Inc.) are masters of buzz, and part of their wizardry is in getting all these people/sites/news outlets to quoting “sources” that don’t know what they’re talking about, most times without even using quotes, sometimes without using names (or, when they do, not names that have “Apple, Inc.” in them or even remotely connected to them), and without using any concrete details. Anyhoo,

We have it from reputable sources that…

Today, October 4, 2011, Apple may or may not unveil the iPhone 5, and it may or may not have a tear-drop form factor, and it may or may not be available within two to three weeks after the maybe/maybe not unveiling today.

Sorry for the rant. Went online to see if today’s Apple event had already taken place, and if so, what the report was. I found nothing but wild speculation. I finally thought, “If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.” Well, actually I thought, “I am about as qualified to speculate as any of these so-called sources,” and I decided to post a rant. I feel better. Thank you for reading. Click comment to vent your own rant. Or just to make me feel better. Or just because you can.

We “less-than-three” you Tim/Tom Cook! Or whatever your name is. <3

I’ve seen the Mac’s future

OS X Snow Leopard was all the rage until Apple released OS X Lion a few days ago. Ever wonder what Apple will use for code names for its new OS X releases once all the big cat names are used up? I’ve seen the future, and it isn’t pretty. On the bright side, the company’s brag lines for the release will tout that holographic interface elements [will] allow you to tap, swipe, and scroll your way through your apps using fluid Mid-Air gestures that make everything you do feel more natural and direct. Also, full-room apps [will] allow you to compute no matter where you are enjoying your Mac. I could tell you more, but then I’d have to go forward in time and stay there, so I would not be killed in this present timeline. 🙂 I’m already in danger. The meerkats are coming for me.

Mt. Technology

Back then, technology was a mountain,
     and the young boy thought he could climb it.
And he wanted to.

Back then, his brain was sharp,
     and his brainstorms awesome.
And he had ideas.

Back then, the Internet was unheard of,
     and games beckoned to be created.
And longing peaked.

Then forces beyond his control arose
     and turned his brave new world upside down.
And still he tried.

Then the “how” kept changing, and growing ever harder,
     and his ideas were not enough.
And still he tried.

So now, his brain is dull,
     and his brainstorms are played out.
And he’s out of steam.

So now, his ideas are gone,
     and his hopes are faded and dark.
And he’s giving up.

So now, technology is a mountain,
     but the old man knows he cannot climb it.
And he doesn’t want to.

He sits with a phone that’s a computer,
     and a camera, and a DVR, and a PDA.
And he tries to make a call.

The microwaves have cooked his brain,
     and he cannot work the thing.
And still he tries.

A young boy tries to help him, saying,
     “Here, let me show you.”
But the cancer is too far spread.

The young boy sees technology as a mountain,
     and he knows he can climb it.
And he wants to.

One can tell his brain is sharp,
     and his brainstorms awesome.
And he has ideas.

—Doug Joseph
January 17, 2011